Tubular Bells: a review of a bus in one part.
As any well-seasoned commuter will tell you, there’s nothing quite like that new bus smell: the gentle, uplifting aroma of leather and freshly minted polymer fabrics intermingled with the harsher industrial chic of stain-proof plastic.
This very scent greeted your humble reporters - Tom Bateman and Matt Copson - as they mounted the beast, resplendent in its commercial livery of red and blue. A moment of glory to cherish. Yes, mettlesome followers, prospectors of the mighty blogosphere, this is the new fleet of Oxford Tube buses. The audacious move from the company’s previous armada of 75 seater ‘Plaxton’ coaches has been well documented in the national press, but what of these intrepid new vehicles, which some have already described as ‘made in Belgium’?
(above) Van Hool himself.
Despite costing the rather bountiful sum of £350 000 (christy!), little has really changed. This was most apparent when the gallant Van Hool was OVERTAKEN by an older model. It felt like the same juddering sensation of injustice that I experienced when, as a child, my brother over-salted my tank of Sea Monkeys. Needless to say, chaos ensued and they all perished in a brine-induced respiratory disaster. Anecdotal tomfoolery aside, the new bus appears to perform well in the straights, surging pleasingly forward as we accelerated out of Shepherd’s Bush.
There’s plenty of eye candy too. Certainly Tom was delighted to see a new elevated pedestal for the London Lite, and while velour ceiling panels aren’t to everyone’s taste, they added a touch of luxury that was sorely missed by the previous buses’ dingy drablon interiors. Matt was extremely impressed by the panache of the mood lighting. It felt more like a suavewhorehouse than a mere transportation vehicle. Which was nice.
This is not to say the caliber of fellow Tubers has increased. Oh no! We sat next to two youths, whose conversations ranged from the devilish inadequacies of Facebook Chat, contraceptionand just about everyone they knew (choice quote: ‘if I have a baby, will you babysit?’). Although one did have quite good trainers. Saying that, this is the kind of garment one would expect to find on a bus of this stature.
All things considered, there’s a decidedly updated feel to the new Oxford Tube buses. The days when your daily commute would end in a breakdown, or, as on one memorable occasion, in a catastrophic ball of flame, are well and truly over. The era of the Van Hool has begun, a revolution is sweeping the M40 like the Jarrow March and the Great Plague before it.
When interviewed, I think our driver (‘David- here to help’), summed it up most agreeably when asked about the dramatic update.
‘Well, it’s a new bus, and i’ve just got to drive it.’
Tom Bateman and Matt Copson
